Prima data cand imi amintesc ca am vazut o jucarie sexuala a fost la o „Petrecere a pasiunii” gazduita in apartamentul unuia dintre prietenii mei din colegiu. Intregul eveniment a fost incredibil de penibil si imi amintesc ca am facut tot posibilul pentru a ma relaxa si a ma distra. Am jucat jocuri unde am discutat deschis despre viata noastra sexuala si despre sexcapadele anterioare.
De-a lungul petrecerii, diferite jucarii au fost descrise si trecute in jurul pentru fiecare dintre participanti pentru a obtine o experienta practica. Intregul autoturism era plin de chicote nervoase si o electricitate sexuala aproape palpabila.
Spre sfarsitul petrecerii, ni s-au dat mici foi de hartie pentru a comanda si ni s-a cerut sa trecem pe langa o masa cu fiecare jucarie pusa pe afisaj.
Imi amintesc ca am fost atat de nervos sa fac o alegere si chiar mai nervos daca ar fi sa aleg unul care trebuia livrat in apartamentul meu, unde locuiam cu iubita mea de liceu.
Am respirat un suspin de usurare cand micul vibrator violet pe care l-am ales a fost ultimul pe care reprezentantul de la petrecere il avea in stoc, asa ca a fost disponibil sa il iau acasa.
Am parasit evenimentul cu drag si o emotie pe care nu o mai simtisem niciodata.
Interesant este ca acele pozitive au fost contracarate de ganduri usoare care au dat si rusine. Am crescut intr-un mediu catolic si m-am luptat mereu cu ideea placerii de sine, sexul folosit ca mijloc pentru placere, sex in afara casatoriei si avand un orgasm prin mijloace care nu erau cu o alta persoana (cu care ar trebui sa ma marit. la).
Stiam, de asemenea, ca, daca vreau sa-mi aduc noua achizitie in dormitor cu partenerul meu, va trebui sa trec mai mult decat cum sa-mi dau seama ce drum merg bateriile.
De atunci, in viata mea, lucrurile s-au schimbat mult. Acum, imputernicirea si explorarea sexului si sexualitatii este o tesatura a fiintei mele si este ceea ce imi petrec majoritatea zilelor ajutandu-i pe oameni.
Nu pot sa nu retraiesc o parte din povestea petrecerii pasiunii de fiecare data cand am conversatii cu clienti si prieteni care cauta sa se joace cu jucarii sexuale de orice fel pentru prima data.
Daca primele mele experiente, cu chiar si cele mai de baza jucarii, au fost incomode si usor pline de rusine, imi imaginez ca exista o multime de alte persoane care sunt la fel de timide cu ideea.
Impartasind din experienta personala si din experienta anumitor persoane cu care am lucrat, iata cateva lucruri bune de stiut atunci cand aveti in vedere sa adaugati piese de teatru sexy in anumite momente sexy.
- Jucariile sexuale sunt menite sa va ajute in placerea dvs. sexuala, nu sa inlocuiti partenerul.
Daca partenerul dvs. face o sugestie pentru adaugarea sau explorarea jucariilor sexuale, nu inseamna ca nu le placeti. Daca este ceva, acesta este un semn ca partenerul tau are incredere suficienta in tine pentru a fi vulnerabil in mijlocul unui act personal foarte sacru.
- Make your decision based off of a conversation. I suggest creating a sex toy Want, Will, Won’t list so that you can determine your comfort level and your boundaries, along with the comfort level and boundaries for your partner. Once you have a better understanding of dynamics and preferences, you can make an informed sex toy purchase. Toys can be used for all sorts of play – vibrators, cock rings, dildos, BDSM scene accoutrements, and other kink-related material. It’s best to create your lists with open communication. Maybe take the BDSM Test at www.bdsmtest.org to help with your decision.
- I suggest that your first sex toy purchase include:
– a blindfold (a personal fave) – sensory deprivation enhances other active senses and can make the person who is blindfolded feel less exposed when playtime begins, while the person learning to give pleasure through sex toy play has the opportunity to relax and explore without having eyes on them the entire time.
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- Have a safe word, and when playtime begins, continue communicating. Tell your partner when something feels good and when something does not. I find that a blindfold helps with the comfort level around keeping communication free-flowing as well.
- All sex toys are not created equal.
Choose toys that are made of high-quality, non-toxic material.
Some toys are waterproof and some are not. Make sure to check before you play, just in case your sexy session moves to a new environment.
- Knowing about the toy doesn’t take the fun out of it! The more information you get on sex toys that interest you, the easier it is to enjoy the experiences that include them.
- Get help where you need it if you are dealing with sexual shame from any area of your life.
I needed to heal from shame surrounding my faith and the lack of healthy sex-related information provided to me while growing up.
Step one is identifying the problem areas and then gaining assistance and support in healing from wounds in those aspects of your life. There are plenty of resources available and people like myself and other sex experts that specialize in sex education and sexuality empowerment, who can assist you on your journey. When you treat the core area of discomfort and/or pain, adding things like sex toys into your life can lead to magical, orgasmic experiences.
Sex toys can be a fun way to spice things up in the bedroom, but they can also be a way to further connect with yourself and your partner.
Understand that sometimes things don’t go according to plan; choose to laugh when things go a little different than your expectations. Always give certain toys and instances a second chance and remember to breathe and be present.
Sex is fun and pleasure is good for you.
Alexa
Here are some of my favorite places to shop for toys. Please note, some of these are affiliate links and I may receive compensation for my recommendation.
